Goddess Within

 

Waiting for the Wake Up Call

Waiting for the Wake Up Call

“The only thing that is constant is change.” Heraclitus of Ephesus

Yet, the fear of change immobilizes people. I was a part of a very conservative, fundamental, Bible believing group of people for 30 years. The only change they promoted was to continually get closer to God-read more of the Bible, pray more, witness to others more, give more than your tithe,  and attend more and more church supported activities. They kept their children in church supported schools and encouraged their young adults to attend Bible college.

Little discussion occurred outside of their teachings. Science, math, philosophy or history were seldom examined.

When my children were in public school, I decided to attend a local university. I was amazed at the plethora of thoughts, ideas, cultures and religious practices-or of the absence of religious harangue. When I began my career, I became a colleague with people from India, Israel, Iran, Syria, Romania, China, and Turkey. Our lunch breaks were filled with discussion on each other’s countries, cultures, traditions and faiths. I had never been exposed to such open discussion.

Over the course of time, the varnish that the church had layered on my soul began to crack. I began to question old ‘truths’. I wondered about the validity of the doctrines I had been taught. I eventually had to admit that I was out of harmony with those teachings. Leaving the church was not a simple act, as my husband was a minister, and hundreds of people expected me to ‘stay the same’.

Yet, as Thomas Paine said, “The mind, once enlightened, cannot again become dark.”  Enlightenment drastically changed my life. It cost me my marriage. It cost me my ‘friends’. But it awakened a goddess within me.

The photo at the start of my blog represents to me the inner person- who is beautiful. She is magical. She was waiting for me to awaken. Now life is filled with wonder, adventure and exploration.  She is my muse. She was with me all the time waiting for me to notice her and to join her in a new world that is filled with opportunities for change.

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