Poulet Noir at Apethorpe Hall

“The secret to humor is surprise.”  Aristotle

Ronnie W Floyd, the new President for the largest protestant group in America is invited to a dinner party at Apethorpe Hall in England. He is thrilled at the opportunity to dine with distinguished guests and share with them the virtues of the Southern Baptist principles.

Ronnie is seated next to George Villiers, the 1st Duke of Buckingham. Also present at the table is the beautiful, yet quiet Joan Flowers, seated next to her is Frederick Douglas who is chatting with Susan B Anthony. As Ronnie does not recognize any of the dinner guests he is pleased to see that King James I will be seated to his right. James has not yet arrived, but Ronnie is delighted to get to meet him as he is the one who commissioned the beloved King James Authorized Version of the Holy Bible.

The choleric Ronnie falls silent as he is overcome with the dinner conversation. He wonders how it got so out of hand. George is drawing hearts on his napkin and making a list of men to include in his next dinner party. He mentions to Frederick that many of them are gay. He asked if Frederick would oppose such a dinner party. Frederick is supportive. He has lived through a terrible time when people were allowed to perform hate crimes. He cannot believe that many people in society continue to behave as though they are better than other people.  Susan is nodding in complete agreement.  Women suffered as they tried to find their place in society. Susan is complaining that women still can’t preach or be ordained in Southern Baptist Churches. Joan finally speaks up. She is petite and respectful. She is a naturalist who had been accused of witchcraft. She informs the group that they should ask Ronnie about it. Ronnie is the new president for that religious group. Perhaps he might shed some light on the Southern Baptists feelings about African American people, women, naturalists, and their campaign against the Gay Agenda.

Ronnie’s breathe quickens. His heart rate picks up. He has addressed these issues many times from his pulpit. But looking into their faces now, he is uncertain how to begin. He prays for the quick entrance of King James. If ever he needed the Biblical support, he needed it now.

Finally, King James comes through the newly discovered hidden passageway of Apethorpe Hall. He is dressed for the party. Ronnie reaches out to greet him, but King James steps past him and into the arms of his lover, George Villiers.

The servers bring in Poulet Noir. Let the feast begin.

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