Only Once

“Expectation is the mother of all frustration.” Antonio Banderas

I have an apparently peculiar quirk. I think that I should only have to do something once. Say it once. Touch it once. File it once. Isn’t that the teaching of efficiency? Oh dear…I have another quirk-I think things should be efficient.

No wonder some days annoy me. My expectations that things should run efficiently and smoothly are adversely affecting my blood pressure. Ah…a splash of insight. Many of the above expectations occur in an office and are impacted by other people; other people who are messing with my mode of efficiency.

Wait. That still admits I have an expectation of efficiency. Perhaps I could change that to a desire for efficiency, but realize that a multitude of events, and people, will complicate my hope. I do get paid for that complication. However, it does slow things down. Damn…another expectation-that I will get a lot of things done in a day. Some days it takes all day to get someone to get labs done right, packaged correctly, picked up and processed as they should be. How could that take so long? I don’t know, but some days it does.

What am I left with? Go to work, don’t expect people to be competent,  an office to be efficient, or to get much done. There! My frustration could vanish.

But who would I become?

Best I keep my quirks, and learn how to manage letting go of my expectations of others. Perhaps that was the mother of invention to the happy hour/cocktail after a day’s work!



Oy Vey Ist Mir

“Sedulously eschew obfuscatory hyperverbosity and prolixity.” Roedy Green

What the hell does that mean? Deja Vu. I was there yesterday. I had asked a simple question. “Please provide for me the dates that go with visit 3, 4, and 5”. I am responsible for tracking those dates. We get paid by a sponsor for those dates.

Two days later, 8 emails, known and unknown people adding to the stream of computer discussions.

I still do not have an answer.

I think Green’s quote above is describing ‘obfuscate’. In other words- to go on and on, in circles, saying nothing, being unclear in a hope to bewilder the listener. If they do it long enough, they hope you will forget the original question.

Oy vey ist mir. Oh woe is me.

The transforming flow of emotions I experience when I deal with someone who obfuscates seems to follow a consistent pattern. Impatience-Anger-Resentment-Anger-Impatience-Anger-Resentment—-these roll along until I arrive at an exasperated frustration. I get spent out.

I suppose the obfuscater feels a little smile creep at the corners of their lips. I wonder if they embrace a sense of victory.

No matter. The fallen soldier gets back up. Needed a nice dinner, little wine, distracting movie and a good nights sleep. I think of George L Griggs saying, “Exasperation is the minds way of spinning its wheels until patience restores traction.”

The greater issue here is that I have responsibility without authority. Horrible place to be. You have visited there I am sure. It is not on Rick Steve’s 100 places to go before you die travel log.

So, when I am rested what do I do? I remind myself that this is not my circus, not my monkeys. I become a documentation specialist. I do what I can do, I let those who may have authority know, and then I have to let it go. I could be stubborn enough to push the question until I got the answer. In those cases, I might as well draw a circle on the wall of my office-at head level-walk up to it, as though it was my target, and bang my head against the wall. Right in the circle, right on target.

But what would I have done to myself? Obtained a headache and wasted my time. So I focus on what I can do. Where I can make a difference.

“You’ve done it before and you can do it now.  See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy of your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination.” Ralph Marston