Idle Anticipation

“There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.” Bill Patterson, Calvin and Hobbes

My last day of work is arriving soon. I will turn over my computer-yikes! Is it possible? I have checked work emails 24-7 for many years. What will I do when the urge hits to see what is happening at work? Well, I hope I smile and remind myself- ‘oh that’s right, I’m retired!’

I was raised around a puritan work ethic-make every minute count. And I sure tried to do that. I crammed into every hour not only many things, but I tried to make them as varied as possible so that I constantly had to switch hats as they say. A master juggler of multi-tasking! Well, my arms are tired and I don’t see the balls so well anymore.

I recently read a wonderful book (that I highly recommend!) A Gentleman in Moscow written by Amor Towles. The main character Rostov is questioned early into the book about his daily activities. Rostov responds, “Dining. Discussing. Reading. Reflecting. The usual rigmarole.” 

My new goal! Dining, discussing, reading, reflecting. Retirement rigmarole!

“Those who decide to use leisure as a means of mental development, who love good music, good books, good pictures, good plays, good company, good conversation-what are they? They are the happiest people in the world.” William Lyon Phelps

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16 Tons

“You load 16 tons and whaddaya get?? another day older and deeper in dept.” Tennessee Ernie Ford sings it well, and it’s a story that is eternal.

We are restoring a home that was believed to have been built by one of the founders of our city. That would make it about 200 years old. We discovered clues that this house might have been a station for the Underground Railroad. We have pushed up the floors, pulled in the walls and given her a new hat. So far, we are into the 10th year of our project.

We restored the attic first, and have worked down the 3 floors. Tons of plaster moved, tons of foundation rock restored, and we ‘owe my soul to the company store’!

 

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/musical-marker/

Dancing Shoes

Odd that such a forbidden object would now be connected to me. When I call my friend, she hears, “Dancing Queen” swaying from her cell phone. How was I kept from dancing for so long?

My church forbid it. If you danced, you were sinful. You had to make a choice of dancing at your daughter’s wedding, or continuing to serve as a deacon in your church.

I was a dancing closet queen. I felt an inner thrill as I watched the dancers in old musicals. Their dresses swirling and their partners leading them across the floor. Alone in my room I would move to the music. In fact, I found it impossible to hold still. One day, I woke up, and I realized that I had been told a lie. Dancing was not sinful. Dancing was a part of life.

Children seem to have natural rhythm. Who takes that away?  What a terrible shame. I found dancing to be meditative. When I hear music and start to move in harmony with it’s melody, I forget my troubles. I forget the frustrations of the day. Hours can go by and I am still on the dance floor.

My regret is that I learned to dance so late. My body can only dance so long. Fortunately, my soul does not tire. Dancing is how I get through life.

Barbera de Angeles said, “The moment in between what you once were, and who you are now becoming, is where the dance of life really takes place.”

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/object-lesson/

 

The Dance

“The moment in between what you once were, and who you are now becoming, is where the dance of life really takes place” Barbara de Angelis

I have two regrets in my life.

1. If I ever made anyone feel bad for how they believed (there is a risk that could have occurred having come from such a conservative fundamental religious background)

2. that I didn’t dance sooner. (that same religious group believed it was wrong to dance–unfortunately I followed their teaching for many years)

When I let myself dance, I found that it was almost like meditation for me. I have three sisters who were very supportive to me while I was going through the separation and divorce from my husband of 31 years. They had always danced and encouraged me to go with them. I had no idea how much fun it was to dance!

When I moved with the music, all I had in  my mind was the flow of the music and the response of my body. All other stressors went away. Dance was exercise, de-stressing and fun! why or why did I wait so long to experience that?

There are many quotes about dance. Here is another,

“When you dance, your purpose is not to get to a certain place on the floor. It’s to enjoy each step along the way.” Wayne Dyer

And that is my philosophy. Life is the dance, it moves with rhythm, changes in timing, crescendos and refrains, occasionally it is cacophonic…. but it is always moving. I am trying to learn to listen to the music around me and in me. I love what Barbara says, “and who you are now becoming”. Everyday we are becoming someone. We change. We grow. We react and we proceed. We move, we might as well dance!