Peaceful Silence

“Even in the most beautiful music there are some silences, which are there so we can witness the importance of silence.” Andrea Bocelli

We live in a loud world. Music. Television. iPad. 24-7 coverage from any electronic device. I find I have to consciously take time to find solitude. Not necessarily to discover a quite room. A room can be empty-other than myself-but it is screaming at me: mop the floor! start dinner! dust my surface!

America is in the final days of a presidential election. Not only do I have to contend with barrage of chatter, some of that chatter tries to tell me what to do, how to act and where to go. Solitude cries for my company.

I am reminded today, to seek opportunities for solitude-to be restored. Let my blood pressure return to normal and my thoughts to return to peace.

“Silence is refreshment for the soul.” Wynonna Judd

Departures

“There is a time for departure, even when there’s no certain place to go.” Tennessee Williams

My sisters have been visiting me and will depart today to return to their homes. Departures can be sad. Today, they each anticipate departing back to their homes and loved ones. This is a planned departure.

I am reminded of a couple times in my life when departures were not necessarily planned.

A friend used to say, if you are going the wrong way-TURN! You may not know where it takes you, but it will at least not be on the known wrong route! I was reminded of his wisdom when I read the above Tennessee Williams quote.

An unplanned departure is like walking through a peaceful meadow. Flowers swaying, fresh air to breath and sun at your back. Suddenly, your next step takes you down a deep hole. At first you are frightened and it is dark and you can’t see your way. You feel around you to get some sort of bearing. You creep along on your hands and knees, feeling all along the way to protect from a further fall or injury. You think perhaps you are trapped in a cave. Your breath quickens and your pulse races. You never expected to be in a place like this. You were happy and content – or so you thought.

As you creep along, you notice a very small light. You move toward that direction, and you realize that you are not in a cave, but in a tunnel! You will be able to escape!

I have taken such a journey. I decided that if I had to be yanked out of my life as I knew it, and had an opportunity to survive it, I would come out of my ‘tunnel’ new. If I came out the same way I entered, what did it benefit me?

“An involuntary return to the point of departure is, without a doubt, the most disturbing of all journeys.” Iain Sinclair

Safe Place

“Man learns through experience, and the spiritual path is full of different kinds of experiences. He will encounter many difficulties and obstacles, and they are the very experiences he needs to encourage and complete the cleansing process.” Sai Baba

There seems to be a common temptation to help others along life’s path. One might feel an eagerness to share what one knows, right? I ask myself, actually fairly frequently, when does ‘sharing’ become ‘bossing’ and, or, ‘directing’ others? There seems to be a very fine line between the two.

Perhaps ‘sharing’ is a response to a request for information or direction.

Perhaps ‘directing’ is pro-offering the information without a request.

Could it be that simple?

There have been many times in my life when I felt a suffering, or a broken heart, as I observed someone I loved struggle with an issue in life. I wanted to rush right in there, and let my loved one know how the issue should be handled. If I didn’t come up with the plan to direct another, there was always a person nearby who reminded me of that duty. Somehow, now making me feel guilty if I didn’t intervene and interject what that person should (the word I do not like!) do.

But, I remind myself-I do not know their life path. I cannot be aware of all that the person I am concerned about is supposed to learn in life. In fact, I could completely mis-direct by pro-offering my direction.

It does take patience and faith though. Mixed with kindness, support, encouragement, and tolerance. There could be a lot of stumbling along the way. I may not be able to prohibit the stumble, but one thing I can do is create a safe place to land. A safe place to find someone they can trust. A safe place to land when they fall.

“….choosing kindness is being more mindful about it, letting go of impatience and intolerance along the way.” Daniel Lubetsky

Gaze at the Present

“Expecting is the greatest impediment to living. In anticipation of tomorrow, it loses today.” Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Anticipation is an interesting noun. It is one word, but can promote vastly opposing emotions. Anticipation can bring hope. Tomorrow will be better. It can bring the warmth of nostalgia as we look forward to a visit with loved ones.

Anticipation can also bring dread. A worry over a decision that may bring negative consequences. It can bring sadness as we learn of a loved one’s terminal diagnosis.

What is one to do? I don’t want to give up hope– “Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul-and sings the tunes without the words-and never stops at all.” so beautifully said by Emily Dickenson.

I also do not want to dread potential-or perhaps actual – negative events that might, or will, come into my life one day.

I am once again, reminded to focus on the present. Glancing with anticipation can provide some pleasure, or perhaps the momentary sense of dread may be enough to make me cautious. But it would behoove me to GAZE at the present. A glance may occur before I can stop myself. Gazing is an act of the will. I can choose to move my glance into a gaze.

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” Buddha

 

 

 

Don’t Rush to Blame

“Great leaders don’t rush to blame. They instinctively look for solutions.”  Nina Easton

Unplanned interruptions are annoying. Unnecessary complications are upsetting. During the course of a busy day, any number of these undesired occurrences can wreck havoc on otherwise engaging plans. When they barge into our lives we can react in a variety of ways:

a. We can fume and pout, stomp and complain.  However, once we stop our ranting we still have the problem.

b. We can blame others. Call people onto the carpet. Dole out disciplines. However, at the end of the confrontation we still have the problem.

c. We can assess the problem. Plan a course of action and implement the proposed solution. We will still need to review how the problem came to be and what consequential actions may be required so that the problem does not re-occur. But at the end of the problem solving, we no longer have the problem.

Efficiency is part of my reason to forgo the ranting, complaining and blaming. It is just a waste of energy. Energy is so precious.

“Most people spend more time and energy going around problems than in trying to solve them.”  Henry Ford

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/rush/

Little Bits

“The first and worst of all frauds is to cheat one’s self.” Pearl Bailey

“This above all: to thine own self be true.” William Shakespeare

These are familiar sayings that we often recall when we are making a decision. We try and find our core which we believe will speak to us and provide us guidance as to a decision.

But does our ‘core’ change? Do experiences change who we are and therefore how we might decide? We are rehabbing a 200 year old home. As we work on the house, I often wonder how the house was originally arranged.  The internal walls have changed many times. Even the external walls have been altered in a few places. But the ‘core footprint’ has remained the same.

Perhaps it is that way with people. The basic core of who we are-kind, compassionate, thoughtful, truthful-remains unaltered as we journey through our lives. Yet, some have experienced hardships and become bitter, cynical, and even hateful. How does that happen? To which self are we to be true. The one pre-hardship? The innocent and naive person? Sometimes I mourn the loss of my innocence and naiveté. Or the new core honed by hardship? Honing can provide new skills-patience, perseverance and tolerance.

Truth, as we understand it, is also tricky. What we once knew-with so much certainty that lives were taken for questioning the truth (such as the world is flat, the sun revolved around the earth…many individuals were  tortured who dared to question that truth of the day). As we grow, learn, and explore our life we may alter our perspective. Is that being a fraud to ourselves? or is that becoming new and fresh again?

“I am a fraud. I have cobbled together my personality from hundreds of little bits. I am simultaneously the most genuine and the most artificial person you will ever meet.”  Sebastian Horsley

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/fraud/

 

Sail with the Phase

“Only when your consciousness is totally focused on the  moment you are in, can you receive whatever gift, lesson, or delight that moment has to offer.” Barbara De Angelis

A life is full of many moments. Some I love, some I tend to resent. I remember when my children were young. Somedays would be more taxing than others. Often during those times a friend would say, ‘they are going through a phase, they will move into another soon.’

I gave that a lot of thought. If I hurried them through every phase, the end result would be to rush their lives. Lives are so short anyway. Why would I rush a life away?

Today, my children are adults. My parents have passed away. Illness and disease have come and gone. And I have asked myself again-would I wish away any of these phases of suffering?

My answer is, no. All the moments have made me who I am today. The good and delightful, and the sad and sorrowful. They comprise me.

Phases do come and go. Some are short, and some seem as though they will never pass. My goal is to keep moving through the phases. Embrace what I can and try not to get stuck in any one place.

“To reach a port, we must sail – sail, not tie at anchor, sail not drift.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/phase/

Mindful Journeys

“Sometimes a journey takes us to a place we have never been before. That place may not be on a map. It may be in our hearts.” Faye Hager

Recently, I have discovered a new type of journey. It does not involve going to a physical destination. I may not even move from my spot where I am standing. Actually, I may be pacing, or I may be rocking-I seldom just stand. It is an emotional journey. I believe emotions are linked to our minds, so it is a mental/spiritual/emotional journey. And that adventure all takes place deep inside of me: me-myself-and I. We have to find our way through it.

I wish I could tell you THE magic formula. I can’t. But I can share some things that help me move from:

anger—-to forgiveness

sadness—to hope

grief—-to acceptance

A book can be written on the process-and may be…perhaps I will call it the “Misery Index”. But I will just list a few of the things that help me transform my thinking.

Talk-don’t keep things inside. If you don’t have someone to talk to-talk to yourself

Keep Busy–don’t sit idle and fret. Get out. There is fresh energy outside yourself.

laugher- great therapy. If you can’t laugh, see a show that can bring out laugher.

accept emotions-don’t bury them. They will get stuck in some deep dark grave in your heart.

At the end of the day, if I can change the way I am thinking about something, I can change the way I feel about it. It may not happen in one day. I may have to fake it till I make it, but I will get there.

“Hope is like the sun, which, as we journey toward it, casts the shadow of our burden behind us.” Samuel Smiles

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/fake/

 

By the Light of the Silvery Moon

“For most people, we often marvel at the beauty of a sunrise or the magnificence of a full moon, but it is impossible to fathom the magnitude of the universe that surrounds us.” Richard H. Baker

I love to see the full moon. Maybe it is because the moon creates a hole in the blackness. That very idea is inspiring to me. Sometimes life seems very dark. In the dark it is hard to find my way. It is difficult to see what lies ahead. In an effort to hurry through the dark place, I run. Running only leads to tripping. So, I have to be more patient. I have to inch along.

Then the full moon comes out! Things do not seem so dark. I still have to tread carefully, but I can see a step or two ahead of me. It wasn’t my eyes that gave me more sight. It was the universe. The moon reminds me that there is other help. There is more wisdom than I have alone. There is direction to be provided. The universe is bigger than me. It is good to be reminded of that.

“To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders.” Lao Tzu

Normal…where is that again?

I have such a strong urge to want life to be normal. For a day to be normal. But, what is ‘normal?’ Who gets to define that? I may want to define it, but in so doing, I could mess up my journey. I might create a beautiful straight, unobstructed path. I guess that could be okay. But I would miss all the adventure and awe of discovering what is around the corner. Of becoming who I am to become.

From time to time, we get to share a part of someone else’s journey. He/she will be the one to trek the entire path, but sometimes we get to walk awhile with them.

Such is my life right now. Walking along with someone I love. Right now, the path is rather dark and hard to see. We are inching along and moving forward. As I try to hold the torch to add illumination, I am inspired by what I see. A life full of courage and determination. A person who does not worry and fret, but who surges on with hope.

“We cannot hold a torch to light another’s path without brightening our own.” Ben Sweetland